The Cost of Inoffensiveness

I was shopping yesterday and thought I should get a new deodorant as mine is running low. I use a stick type. The first thing I noticed was that all the deodorants were more expensive than when I bought my last one. So I started checking the unit price--in this case the cost-per-pound of each brand. I was astonished to see that the cheapest one was over $14/lb and one was over $100/lb. Meat is cheaper. You can buy a human being for less. This puts me on the horns of a dilemma. Should I eat fine steaks served by a gorgeous slave girl or slather some hexachlorophene in my armpits every morning?

Oh, and I decided to wait for a sale on B.O. juice since I still have some left. That'll give me time to cogitate on the matter.